11. May 2026
Mother’s Day Mother’s Day and the Loss of a Parent
My Mother and I
It’s hard to believe that we lost our mom five years ago this July 29th, shortly after she turned 86. While her passing leaves a big hole in my heart, I know she’s in a better place, having suffered through significant consequences following her massive stroke in August of 2012.
I am not ashamed to admit that I was and still am, a momma’s boy. My mom and I had a wonderful relationship and when I think back to those conversations we had, I feel such a warmth spread throughout my being, both physically and emotionally, that I know she’s still watching over me, probably shaking her head and muttering, “David, what do you think you’re doing?” more often than I’d like to admit.
A Mother’s Influence on Writing and Life
She was my biggest fan and always supported my writing. She was an avid reader and had a huge influence on me. I was and still am blessed. She’s always with me and I am grateful for all the sacrifices she and my dad made on my behalf and for my sister as well. Our childhood wasn’t idyllic, but from what I’ve seen in my career, it wasn’t far off.
When I was writing Out of Cabrini, she was one of my readers. I was surprised one day when she called and told me that if I were to include the scene I’d just sent her, she wouldn’t be reading my book any further. I was shocked, though I recognized the scene was quite difficult. She told me why and I listened.
Balancing Realism and Responsibility in Storytelling
With her objections in mind, I did some research and asked more questions and ultimately, I did not include the scene. Instead, I implied the assault and let the reader decide whether something happened.
I don’t see it as a cop out, but an effort by an author to keep their readership in mind. But anyone that has read my books knows I’m not bashful about displaying the street as I’ve experienced it in my life and career. I think it’s a question of appropriateness, which is a consideration for the story, and the reader combined.
Unnecessary violence and ugly behavior are not welcome, unless it advances the story in some fashion. A balancing act.
The Lasting Impact of a Mother’s Perspective
Certainly, my mom was a huge influence, both in my life and writing. When it comes to writing, I always listen to critiques and consider what they’re saying. And then I put it through my own little balancing scale of whether I’m going to make any adjustments. Many times I don’t, but I’m always better off having had the chance to consider their perspective.
Love You Always, Mom
All of that to say, I miss you mom.
Your little boy ain’t so little anymore.
Love you always.
Dave
